When the trust has gone

We drop our children off at school every day and we just kind of assume that their teachers will try to do the best for them, try to inspire them, try to encourage them to be the very best that they can be. We don’t really know what goes on at school. We don’t even know what our children are like at school, we just trust that they’ll be ok and if they’re not, we trust that someone will tell us.

For the parents of children with ASD, we perhaps hold that trust a little closer. We trust that the school will be open and honest with us, we trust that they will understand our children and will adapt their learning so that our children can access education as well as any other child. We can only go by what we are told and the rest we have to take on trust.

But what happens when the trust has gone?

When you no longer believe a single word that you are told. When you realise that all these things that you took on trust, are a big fat lie. That it’s all too much trouble and that no-one has ever been entirely honest with you.

The Boudica family have been feeling this way for quite some time. Then on Saturday, the post brought us Baby Boudica the Elder’s report from the Educational Psychologist. A very nice, hefty 13 page read.  Some of it’s contents shocked us. I hadn’t even got to the bottom of the second page before I started texting friends with very sweary comments.

As the whole thing unravelled, it became clear that we have never been told the whole truth. The truths have been conveniently fudged over and the opinions of professionals have been completely ignored.  It became apparent that the school really had no idea about Autism and how it affects a child’s learning and the worst thing of all, is the amount of lies we had been previously been told.

I don’t really want to go into specifics right now. I will do, very soon. But not yet.

First, I have to find another school. I saw six schools last week and tomorrow, I will choose the lucky candidate. Then I’ll start to feel guilty as I’ll be passing on not one, but 2 SEN children to this new school. We know how popular that will be.

I feel sad. Sad that it had to take me getting very very angry and making a statement application myself. Sad that I’ve been let down and above all, terribly sad that they’ve let my son down.

That is unforgivable and there will be consequences involved. Right now I am concentrating on my boys, I will find them a lovely school who understands their needs and is happy to do everything they can to help them. I will make sure they are happy and content and then I will turn my attentions to those who have let us down so badly.

Those who destroyed that trust so resoundingly.

The Boudica is going to war.

2 Responses

  1. Marie Hatcher

    Good luck for today, hope you can find the boys a lovely new school who going to give them lots of support.
    Go get that pesky headmaster he deserves all he gets.

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